Be honest! Your friends Netflix account? Perhaps you’re downloading movies from naughty torrent sites? You can tell me, heck my entire country of Australia was partially colonised from British thieves who stole things, their punishment that of being exiled to the other side of the world.
My theory is that people steal all the time, but of course, they don’t use such an offensive word. Less harsh words are preferred such as “borrow” when they have no intention of returning the item. The work stationery cupboard is always tempting. “I’m just going to borrow this stapler. And maybe a couple of pens”.
Okay, my turn. I steal from my local KFC. Now, I don’t like to use that word, but there’s no point glossing over the truth. I found an opportunity to take advantage of them due to their negligence and lack of procedure. So now, whenever I get KFC, I score an additional Pepsi and regular chips with extra salt with my meal.
The truth is, I don’t feel guilty. Not even for a second. Having been a customer of KFC for a ridiculous number of years, the number of times I’ve received mediocre and, on occasion, horrible food, I feel entitled to get a little something for free. Annoyingly, my local KFC is terrible at cooking chips. They’re often brown with a few golden yellow chips mixed in. I pick out the good ones; the rest are thrown away. My little theft is barely worth it!
Entitled, that’s the keyword. Nowadays we often feel entitled, so we might take (steal!) a little extra of something. Help ourselves when we’re slightly inconvenienced.
Parents steal all the time. Telling the cinema their precious Jimmy isn’t a teenager so they can avoid paying the adult price. Telling theme parks their children are in fact toddlers. They jump back and forth from being dishonest to stealing, smudging the two together to ease or eliminate any feelings of guilt.
Everyone does it! At least I think they do. City life is both expensive and competitive; we’re all competing for space trying to survive our concrete jungle, taking from each other on a whim. We might forget our manners when in a queue and ‘accidentally’ cut in front of someone or ‘accidentally’ not see them approaching a parking space that you then claim.
On Netflix, have you watched the show The Good Place? Well, we’re not going there, we’re destined for the bad place. I’ll save you a seat!
Am I too harsh and cynical of people?! Or is the truth too blended to recognise the difference between being dishonest and stealing?
I want to hear from you! What’s your dirty little secret?
Comment on Twitter to @GayBoyBible and @AuthorJasonS
Written by Jason Spark
February 9th, 2019